The Israelites were unequally yoked to the Egyptians and God orchestrated a divorce that was obviously against the will of the unbelieving Egyptians because the relationship was working for them. The Israelites cried out to God day and night for Him to rescue them from their plight. God indeed rescued them by obtaining a divorce from the Egyptians. It was not easy because the Egyptians desperately wanted to remain in the union with the Jews. Egypt benefited greatly by this relationship, but Israel was not well served. Therefore, God sent 10 plagues upon the Egyptians to convince them that this union with Israel could not continue. Psalm 105:23-25 in reference to this unequally yoked relationship, says:

²³Israel also came into Egypt, and Jacob dwelt in the land of Ham [Egypt]. ²⁴He [God] increased His people greatly, and made them stronger than their enemies. ²⁵He [God] turned their heart to hate His people, to deal craftily with His servants.

We see corollaries between Egypt & Jacob and unequally yoked Christian marriages. The Israelites lived in Egypt (verse 23), but they were not citizens as were the Egyptians. Christians dwell in the world, but our citizenship is in heaven. Unbelievers are citizens of this present dark world. Both corporate Israel and Christians can become bound together with unbelievers. Verse 24 says, “God increases His people greatly, and made them stronger than their enemies”, which for the Israelites meant population, but for Christians means that we are being sanctified. Now, we are not saying that this verse in Psalms includes Christians growing in sanctification, but only that we see a corollary between the two.

Then, in verse 25, we see God turn the hearts of the godless to hate the people of God. Why would God turn the hearts of the godless against His own people? God does this to separate the people of God from the people of this present darkness. God knows that if His people join with unbelievers, they will commit acts of Idolatry against Him. God is jealous to keep us to Himself. He loves us too much to allow us to be bound together with unbelievers knowing they will pull us into so great a sin as idolatry. It is very important to note that God turned their hearts to hate His people, but God uses a natural process in unbelievers to do this. You may recall this historical narrative in Exodus reveals that God hardened Pharaoh’s heart, but also that Pharaoh hardened his own heart as well. God knows the heart of man. If God acts in accord with His own perfect will, then He will be hardening men’s hearts because they are stubborn and hard hearted. The natural process is simply man’s stubborn pride rebelling against God and His children.

If you are in an unequally yoked marriage, look for signs that God has turned your unbelieving spouse’s heart to hate you. Such will be a good indication that God is working toward separating you from your unbelieving spouse. If your unbelieving spouse demonstrates genuine love for you, then perhaps God is telling you to stay the course. Beware: An unbelieving spouse really wanting to hold on to you is not the same thing as genuine love. Just as the Jews were good for the Egyptians, Christian spouses can be good for unbelievers. After all, we are growing in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness and self-control. Who doesn’t want a spouse with such qualities? So you say, “Well, if I am good for my unbelieving spouse, then I should stay in the marriage.” That depends on how you are good for the unbeliever. If it is to use you to make their godless life a bit easier, then no, you must not stay. “Do not be bound together with unbelievers” (2 Cor. 6:14). If they are working with you toward a greater understanding of God and His gospel, then patience on your part may be what God desires (1 Cor 7:12-16).

Finally, the natural process whereby God hardens the unbelieving spouse’s heart against their believing husband or wife is that the unbelieving spouse hates how your obedience causes them to feel wicked. They are being convicted on a daily basis by your desires, attempts to repent and serve the living God. So they begin to resent you for making them feel the way they do. It never occurs to them to bow the knee to Jesus and join you because they are stubborn and hard hearted against the God who gave them life.